Two men are on opposite sides of the river. The first man shouts, “How do I get to the other side of the river?” The other man shouts back, “You ARE on the other side of the river.”
2024-05-24 20:00:24 +0000 UTC View Post
What’s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What’s purple and fluf
2024-05-24 19:00:31 +0000 UTC View Post
An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender turns to them and says… “What is this, some kind of joke?”
2024-05-24 18:00:28 +0000 UTC View Post
There were two muffins in an oven and one said, “It’s getting kind of hot in here isn’t it?”. The other muffin gasps, “Ahh! A talking muffin!” his cabinet.
2024-05-24 16:00:35 +0000 UTC View Post
The CEO of Ikea was appointed Prime Minister of Sweden. He’s currently assembling his cabinet.
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Boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch the office. I’m on season 6 but I’m not really sure what it’s got to do with security.
2024-05-24 11:00:40 +0000 UTC View Post
A lawyer said to a judge, “My client is trapped inside a penny.” The judge said, “What?” and the lawyer said, “He’s in a cent.”
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What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper.
2024-05-24 03:00:21 +0000 UTC View Post
Did you know that Davy Crockett had three ears? His left ear, his right ear, and his wild frontier.
2024-05-23 23:00:33 +0000 UTC View Post
What did the taco say to Michelangelo? I like your shell
2024-05-23 22:00:28 +0000 UTC View Post
I like what mechanics wear…overall...
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I sympathize with batteries. I’m not included in anything either.
2024-05-23 19:00:25 +0000 UTC View Post
Why is cold water so insecure? It’s never been called hot.
2024-05-23 18:00:22 +0000 UTC View Post
What’s the difference between Black Eyed Peas and Chick Peas? Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song. Chick Peas can hummus one.
2024-05-23 17:00:23 +0000 UTC View Post
I was walking past a farm and a sign said, “Duck, eggs.” I thought, that’s an unnecessary comma. And then it hit me.
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2024-05-23 06:00:33 +0000 UTC View Post
The fact that Head & Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called ‘Knees & Toes’ disappoints me.
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Me trying to decide jf I should eat crisps or chips.
2024-05-22 22:01:12 +0000 UTC View Post
An Irishman walks out of a bar...
2024-05-22 21:00:58 +0000 UTC View Post
