How is your bumday going?
How is your bumday going?
2022-02-27 05:00:03 +0000 UTC View Post
teenytinytaylor posts
Pain and fear effect your hormones. Adrenaline is one of th..
Pain and fear effect your hormones. Adrenaline is one of them. And what goes up, must come down. After your system has been flooded and all things elevated, a sort of slow, soft calm starts to follow. In the aftermath of pain and stage fright can come a big rush of happy because not only did you face fear, you survived. And you get chemically rewarded for a job well done. Being high on your own supply typically only costs time and energy. Unless you’re hiring a teacher…which I recommend in early explorations. Letting go and allowing others to play with your chemistry can be fun.
2022-02-25 19:55:45 +0000 UTC View Post
Watching everything happen at home and feeling like this ....
Watching everything happen at home and feeling like this ...plus irrelevant tits 🤷🏻♀️
2022-02-24 13:38:18 +0000 UTC View PostDefinitely a noun. Not necessarily of the person-variety.
Definitely a noun. Not necessarily of the person-variety.
2022-02-23 00:02:30 +0000 UTC View PostThis had been my mood for the majority of the last few years..
This had been my mood for the majority of the last few years. Just as I felt like I was getting over myself, I had to start getting over the state of the world. And in that, I had to find myself again. I can’t dwell on time past or things that have changed - but a previous version of me certainly did. I was miserable not because my life was terrible, but because my misery is what I was focusing on. Arguably my life is infinitely more chaotic now than it was then and yet I have so much more calm and clarity. Some of that is thanks to age. Some is thanks to experience. But most is perspective. Looking at the same things with a different lens can make the familiar feel brand new.
2022-02-21 18:28:04 +0000 UTC View Post
I haven’t done a live talk in a very long time Come watch m..
I haven’t done a live talk in a very long time Come watch me be nervous on a more prudish platform (Instagram) 😅
2022-02-21 03:22:53 +0000 UTC View Post
The more I empower my body to make my choices for me, the le..
The more I empower my body to make my choices for me, the less I cater to the chaos of the cranium. A “fck yes” and a “fck no” are much easier to distinguish when you make that choice based on feeling vs thought. The brain is tasked with calculating every possible outcome and scenario and THEN dumps chemicals into the body based on what previous patterns have predisposed it to. It’s a confusing cocktail. And can lead us in circles if left unchecked. “What do I want?” vs “What do I need?” vs “What am I open to receiving?” Can all have different answers easily influenced by individual inputs. Do you know what your body signals are saying?
2022-02-19 19:38:13 +0000 UTC View PostWhat are you looking forward to this year?
What are you looking forward to this year?
2022-02-19 05:00:03 +0000 UTC View PostLighting is a great disguise :)
Lighting is a great disguise :)
2022-02-18 05:01:32 +0000 UTC View PostI’ll never forget the first time mushrooms f0rced me to open..
I’ll never forget the first time mushrooms f0rced me to open my heart. I was having such a hard time on one of my first trips in a very dark part of my life. There was no escaping what was coming up - the only way out was through. My body demanded that during this moment in which I was certain I’d never be okay again (you know...those “this is me forever” spirals 🙃) - I had to physically open my heart. Bridges and backbends only. Any other position = puking I couldn’t look at the floor or connect to the ground - I could only open up to the ceiling and find comfort in leaning into the expanse of my breath in my chest. I was physically mourning one reality while beginning to open to a new one. My body had all the wisdom in that moment and automatically took control when my brain was too freaked out to make decisions. And after that surrender, everything started to change. Old found it’s end. New found its channel. And life finally got lighter. Opening your heart is equally physical as it is emotional. Pulling your shoulders back and feeling the softest parts of your body exposed is a direct line to exposing the softest parts of your person as well. For me, yoga has opened my heart just as much as psychedelics, which have done just as much as psychotherapy. Connecting the physical with the emotional with the mental is what unlocks the power that combination possesses.
2022-02-16 14:37:39 +0000 UTC View PostIf you want something, the highest probability of having you..
If you want something, the highest probability of having your needs met is to do it yourself. Physically Emotionally Psychologically Financially Today is a day we tend to think about love. The love we have Or crave Or miss Or fear Regardless of what you're told to buy or think or feel - remember you can love yourself. With your thoughts Your investments Or your hands Whatever the moment calls for
2022-02-15 01:37:21 +0000 UTC View Post
Breath has the ability to take us out of our bodies or put u..
Breath has the ability to take us out of our bodies or put us more deeply into them. Placing your hands on your flesh has the ability to connect you to yourself or help you hate on yourself. Don't like how things feel? Change your inputs. Don't like how things look? Change your perspective. Nothing is truly black and white. Everything exists in a gradient. Small shifts create big changes.
2022-02-09 20:04:15 +0000 UTC View Post
What makes you laugh without fail?
What makes you laugh without fail?
2022-02-05 05:01:08 +0000 UTC View PostI've always known the one cross I would die on (beyond the o..
I've always known the one cross I would die on (beyond the ones I'd love to be b3@t on) is the fact that nudity should not be demonized. It's so dangerous to us collectively, individually physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Our bodies are magnificent universes that are performing tiny and massive miracles on a daily fcking basis. Showing up for yours doesn't have to mean showing it off. Just don't run away from it. Your body loves you unconditionally and supports you in everything that you do. Even when you're sh|tting your pants and suffering with a face full of acne. Your body is not your enemy and never has been. It can just be a loud-mouth b|tch from time to time. Can't you?
2022-02-05 00:40:47 +0000 UTC View Post
Professionally unprofessional tip: unwashed hair photographs..
Professionally unprofessional tip: unwashed hair photographs better. Nothing creates drama and texture quite like the right level of your own filth. That's not wind in my hair - it's just sweat and snack dust. (Self shot in another lifetime)
2022-02-03 23:08:42 +0000 UTC View PostIsolation in itself is an illness. It’s interesting to atte..
Isolation in itself is an illness. It’s interesting to attempt to get better while simultaneously getting worse in other ways. Instead of asking “why is this happening to me” I’m trying to lean into “what can I learn from this?” I actually can finish and enjoy reading multiple books in week if I try. I’m grateful for my rope and my mat. I miss making art. Giant spiders don’t bother me as much as they once did (as long as they stay out of my bed).
2022-02-02 20:00:36 +0000 UTC View Post
Tell me what day it is without checking your calendar
Tell me what day it is without checking your calendar
2022-01-30 16:11:51 +0000 UTC View PostI was supposed to have an Ayahuasca ceremony for my birthday..
I was supposed to have an Ayahuasca ceremony for my birthday, but the universe had different plans. And instead I got C0v|d 🙃 A former version of me would have been very disappointed by this. And to say there aren’t some low feelings would be a lie. But over the last few years I have felt my patience and acceptance of what is become less of an idea that I embrace and more of a truth that I can actually live. Going fast & being in control used to be non-negotiable for me. It’s a great way to get things done and be sure you don’t enjoy the subtleties while they’re happening. Being stripped of external freedom has allowed me to find so much more of it inside. So as I sat alone in my room and knew that all my other friends at this facility were deep in another dimension, I felt no sadness. Only immense gratitude that I can, for the first time in a long time, be alone with myself and enjoy it. Especially without weed. It was a great gift both from the medicine and from myself. I fully know and believe you don’t always have to ingest to take messages from trips - and I got a lot out of last night without drinking a drop. A patience practice I kept running away from because I hate being bad at things has been rope. It’s taken two years for it to start to feel fluid in my fingers. And almost just as long to commit this particular tie to memory. But now it’s in there. It’s not just a concept I observe - but something I can do and feel. And I’m seeking more of that on this next trip around the sun.
2022-01-29 16:12:22 +0000 UTC View PostGuess what I got for my birthday... covid 🙃
Guess what I got for my birthday... covid 🙃
2022-01-28 19:08:25 +0000 UTC View PostToday is my 31st birthday. I write this to you long before ..
Today is my 31st birthday. I write this to you long before that happens - because I'm not sure exactly where I'll be today. But I know it'll be exactly where I'm supposed to be. It is scary to turn off one's sources of income and social contact in an attempt to access more of living. But it was a step I always knew was coming and was just too afraid to admit to. I have nothing more to offer you today asides from my thanks and appreciation. Going forward, truthfully I am conflicted on what I have to offer you. I still cannot land on how I feel about these efforts. Every time I'm receiving messages about how much the representation and fun in the content means to you (and your partners) - it makes me feel like this is light work. This is valuable content. This is worth doing. My boundaries are worth exploring. Because that's what we're ALL doing. But chatting with family again has made me realize how much shame still exists. Spending time with my corporate clients that no longer want to tag my photography work or be associated with me online makes me feel like I'm pigeonholing my future. Or is it culling external factors down to the ones that are actually right for me? I still struggle - almost daily - to decide how I'm going to show up here. Even after all this - I fear myself constantly. So if seeing that struggle means something to you and yours - if I could receive anything from you today - it would be support. Emotionally. Financially. Or both. The only thing that took more of a beating over the last two years than my mental health has been my savings account. I would not be in the program I am currently in if my parents could not afford to send me. But I'm still paying bills and seeing it go out without seeing much more come in. I am limiting my contact and my inputs in order to give the appropriate amount of space to the work I'm trying to do - but it is lonely. Some people I considered my friends haven't reached out in months. Some of my family - it's been even longer. So if this is something I am going to return to, it needs to be more than just content. I need community. I need stability. I need purpose. Maybe this is it. Maybe it isn't. Only time and I will decide. But if you'd like input - I'd love to have it <3
2022-01-28 16:12:05 +0000 UTC View Post